Effin Westside Parade

What happened to the good old days when there was a librarian with glasses sliding down the tip of her nose, screaming at the irreverent to 'Shh,' and 'Be Quiet.' All I want to do is read -- I can't do it at home because ADHD is a killer. I can't do it during class because my doodles need me, I can't do it at work because the customers are hungry for steak and potatoes. So where do I come? To Library Effin West -- aka Effin Westside Parade.

It's so loud! I haven't got anything done...well except this. The insignificant ramblings of two retards - nothing against the mentally handicap, but these two are defiling your name. They have been Facebooking for the past hour... nothing against Facebook-- except that if it weren't created, I would never have to hear about Becky sleeping with Tom at the Christmas Party. ALL OF IT IRRELEVANT-- ALL OF IT WASTING MY BRAIN SPACE. I need to read about Africa and India and migration and saving the world. But for these two dimwits, Facebooking is life. Stupidity is contagious, please don't give me what you got.

The only reading they do are status updates. They've studied their 'mini-feed' friends --read their comments, critiqued their pictures and then proceed to throw in their own absurd analysis with hopes for rebuttal. Damn, if they could only use their powers for good. SPACE WASTERS! Remove your fake whispers from my ears, for it is worse than the loudest yell. Take your loudly wrapped crunch bar and shove it up your ass. I've been chanting 'fuck you' for the past 20 minutes and you still haven't closed your lips.

Sadly, the Dumb have landed and they reside in Gainesville. I'm just a visitor, and you and I have nothing in common. My synapses work better than yours...and I prefer human contact. This has been going on way too long! Hand me that pen and those papers over there, so we can finalize this divorce.

Eff this and Eff you...I'm going home.

♥T